The frenzy that is the first round of the NHL playoffs is upon us — and if the first night is any indication, the theme is defense, defense, snore… I mean, defense. I mean, really. The last time we came out of a lockout, hockey was exciting and fast-moving. This lockout has punctuated the return of the dead puck era, where neutral zone traps and left wing locks are de rigeur. Out of six teams playing Tuesday night, only the Anaheim Ducks managed to score more than one goal in regulation time. All hail Teemu Selanne and his wrist shot of doom!
If tonight’s games between the Canucks & Sharks and the Pens and Isles end 2-1 in OT, can we just fast forward to the final and be done with it?
EA Sports has used NHL 13 to prognosticate the NHL playoff results, and they’ve come up with the New York Rangers as a surprise winner of Lord Stanley’s mug over Jonathan Toews and the Chicago Blackhawks in the final. Our man Jake Hall decided to sim it up as well, and he got a decidedly different result:
by Jake Hall
For fans of the Vancouver Canucks, the “official” EA Sports sim wasn’t pretty. It involved a second round sweep at the hands of the Kings — a sweep! What is this, 2012? Needless to say, I was hoping for a different outcome when I ran the 2013 playoffs through my humble PS3 in the Hall household.
Check it out after the jump.
Western Conference Round 1
(1) Chicago vs (8) Minnesota
A huge surprise right off the bat as the Wild pull off the upset of the century. (The century is young, after all…) Minnesota in 6 — maybe all that cash they dropped on Parise & Suter wasn’t a bad move after all.
(2) Anaheim vs (7) Detroit
Another upset as Detroit is able to knock off the number two seed. But can we really call any Red Wings win a surprise? There’s just so much experience in that room, and we at Pucked in the Head are still skeptical that Anaheim ever won a Cup in the first place. (How do you spell ‘conspiracy’, boys and girls? D-U-C-K-S.) Detroit in 7.
(3) St. Louis vs (5) Los Angeles
The Kings take care of business in a hurry, despite the Blues taking game one. LA in 5.
(4) Vancouver vs (6) San Jose
Do the Canucks ever make anything easy? They have to come back from a 3-1 deficit but in the end pull out the victory. (Ed. note: heh heh, he said ‘pull out’.) Vancouver in 7.
Eastern Conference Round 1
(1) Pittsburgh vs (8) New York Islanders
Firepower prevails as the Pens give Islander fans a taste of reality. Even without Sid in the lineup, Pittsburgh can throw Malkin, Iginla, Neal, Letang, Morrow & Kunitz over the boards. Not too shabby. Tavares & Co. make it interesting, at least. Pittsburgh in 6.
(2) Montreal vs (7) Ottawa
Montreal survives a long, tough series against the Ottawa Senators, who look inspired by the return of Erik Karlsson. The young Habitants look like a deep threat. (Heh heh. At first I thought that said… well, you know.) Montreal in 7.
(3) Washington vs (6) New York
Rick Nash and Brad Richards stun the Ovechkin-led Capitals. Goaltending is key in this series. New Yawk in 6.
(4) Boston vs (5) Toronto
Colour me surprised as the Maple Leafs sweep the Boston Bruins. I’m sure if this were to actually happen Toronto fans would stay humble. ‘Cos, you know, they’re like that. Toronto in 4.
Western Conference Round 2
Los Angeles vs Minnesota
The Wild put up a fight, but the Kings know what it takes. Darryl Sutter has the boys hand in their rings until the off season. Kings in 6.
Vancouver vs Detroit
Vancouver looks like the team in 2011 that Canuck fans fell in love with. Schneider is solid after returning from his “body injury”, and the Sedin twins are rocking it. What could go wrong? Canucks in 5.
Eastern Conference Round 2
Pittsburgh vs NYRThe Igilna trade is paying dividends as he helps the Pens trounce the Rangers. Henrik Lundqvist has a Luongo-like meltdown late in the series. Pittsburgh scores it up, and wins in 6.
Montreal vs Toronto
Western Conference Finals
Vancouver vs Los Angeles
Well Canuck fans, here it is. A chance at redemption, a shot to squeeze through that Sedin-sized window. And… EA predicts the series goes pretty much the same way the matchup did last season. The Kings are just too big and too strong, and sadly, too stingy. LA in 5.
Eastern Conference Finals
Pittsburgh vs Montreal
Les Habitants, ladies and gentleman, are off to the Stanley Cup final. A year ago this squad earned a berth in the lottery pick, but this year they revive the matchup that saw Patrick Roy beat Wayne Gretzky in 1993. Montreal in 5.
Stanley Cup Finals
Los Angeles vs Montreal
Don’t shoot the messenger, but we’ve got a repeat champ for the first time since Steve Yzerman led the Red Wings to back-to-back Cups in 1997 and 1998. The Kings get plenty of (gasp!) offense from stars Jeff Carter and Mike Richards. Jon Quick stands tall when necessary. Kings in 6.
Conn Smythe Winner: Jeff Carter (14G + 9A in 21 games)